tebtosca | FIC: The Sake of Momentum (Part 3 and Epilogue)

It’s warm in the van—too warm—but Jensen snuggles closer to Jared where they sit pressed up against the worn leather seats in the back. In the dark of the interior, he takes in their rescuers slouched in various spots around the vehicle. Some are tense, like Alona, clutching her weapon, or laid-back with eyes closed like Misha.

“We’ve been driving a long time,” Jared whispers, nuzzling his nose against the side of Jensen’s face. Jensen pushes back into it and reaches up for a quick kiss.

Jensen sees Alona looking at them with an unreadable expression, but is too emotionally and physically exhausted to care what she thinks about them.

“Go to sleep, boys. We’ve got a while yet,” JD’s voice comes from the front of the van where he’s driving. Jensen stiffens for a moment, but then the van is rocking and Jared’s shoulder is comfortable and he lets his eyes close.

“I’ll keep watch. Don’t you worry.” Jared’s comforting words are the last thing Jensen hears as darkness finally overwhelms him and he sleeps.

==

Jensen’s woken up by Jared shaking him. He rubs his eyes sleepily, and allows himself to be wrapped in a blanket before stumbling towards the door of the van.

Jensen blinks rapidly, eyes adjusting to something they’ve never felt before.

Sunshine.

The blanket falls to the rocks and dirt at his feet as Jensen turns his face to the sky in awe.

A hand creeps into his own, and Jensen turns quickly to see Jared’s dazed face looking back at him. Slowly—with wonder and eyes shiny—they smile at each other and let the warmth wash over them.

A strange sound hits them, and they turn to see a group of birds flying over their heads. They soar together as a group—one unit beautiful in their synchronicity—but then a single one breaks off and dives out of rotation. Jensen envies that little bird, respects it for claiming its own space. Even though it might end up in the same place as his brethren, he’s the one choosing the direction.

“What’s the hold up, Sterling?” JD shouts from up ahead. Jensen realizes they must have been standing there for a while, because JD is already opening up a hatch leading into a ramshackle structure built into what looks like the side of a mountain.

The man with the dark skin and shaved head stands watching them from a few feet in front of them. He’s looking at them with an odd expression, mouth tilted up in what might be an attempt at a smile.

“I think they are watching the birds, JD,” Sterling finally replies with a drawl, shaking his head in amusement as he cocks his head to get the boys to follow him.

“Got ourselves a couple of nature lovers. Danni’s gonna love that,” JD says with a snicker, and Jensen thinks he’d be a lot more embarrassed if he wasn’t so enraptured by the fact that he’s still standing in the sunshine.

“Feels good, huh?” Alona says, voice low. Jensen jumps a bit because he hadn’t realized she was behind them. She picks up the blanket and tosses it to him.

Jensen—not knowing how to put how profound the moment is into words—simply nods and squeezes Jared’s hand even tighter.

They finally start moving and Jensen has but a minute to look over the barren, rocky land around them before they are being ushered through the hatch and down a set of stairs to what appears to be an underground bunker. Jensen misses the sunshine the second the clang of metal sounds behind him.

They proceed down a long hallway for what seems like ages, lit by a string of fluorescent lights at the top near the low ceiling. Jensen, still exhausted from the journey, struggles to keep up not only with the athletic rescuers, but also Jared and his extra-long legs. He stumbles, but, like always, Jared is there to catch him.

Finally, the hallway twists to the right, and opens up into a large room with much higher ceilings and a massive lighted table dominating the space. Misha has already thrown his jacket down on a nearby table and is sitting back in a chair with his feet up. Another man —this one short and stocky with long brown hair tied back in a ponytail—comes up to talk to JD, completely ignoring the new guests.

“Took you long enough,” the man says gruffly, clasping his forearm to JD’s in what Jensen supposes is a greeting.

“You know me, Kane. Safety first,” JD replies, as the man rolls his eyes.

“Anyone tracking you?” Kane continues. His voice is harsh, and Jensen is a little wary about what his place in the group is.

“Nah, we’re good. Rhodes and her crew blew up the sweatshop building over on North Hudson right past midnight. Had all the uniforms in the area heading in that direction.”

Jensen looks up at Jared, who is chewing on his bottom lip nervously. Blowing up buildings?

“How did you get us out so easily?” Jensen blurts out. Kane finally looks over at them like he just noticed they were there.

“They think they are safe because we never hit the non-dupe breeding facilities.” JD grins, but his eyes are dark and vicious. “Hubris is a bitch.”

Jensen swallows hard at the word “breeding” and doesn’t understand half of what they are talking about, but just nods for now and figures they’ll find out more eventually.

“Didn’t anyone teach you fools manners? “ Another new person, this time a woman with reddish brown hair tied up in a bun and a round, kind face, comes up and holds her hands out to them.

“Go ahead, take them,” she urges, a little indentation popping up at the bottom of her cheek as she wiggles her fingers.

Jensen looks over at Jared quickly, before reaching out and taking one of her hands in his. Jared copies the movement and the three of them look at each other for a moment.

The woman smiles brightly, and she looks pleased. “My name’s Danneel. Welcome to your new life.”

“I’m Jensen, and this is Jared.” Jensen hears the rumbling in the room, and even Danneel manages to barely hide the surprise in her face.

“Well, aren’t those fine names,” Danneel says, her voice slow and firm. “Did you pick them yourselves?”

Jensen holds his head up with pride, belly fluttering at the acknowledgement of their identities. “Yes, ma’am, we did.”

“Oh god, I’m only thirty three. None of this ma’am stuff!” Danneel says with a laugh, squeezing their hands one last time before slipping the blanket off of Jensen’s shoulders and ushering them to some chairs near the table.

“That what it says on your shirts?” Kane says, voice like steel.

Jensen can hear Danneel cluck her tongue in annoyance at Kane’s tersely asked question.

Before Jensen can brace himself, Kane is across the room and standing right in front of them, grabbing at the thin cotton against their chests. Jared instinctually reacts and starts pushing him off of Jensen, but not before Kane manages to get a good glimpse at their duplicate designations.

His eyes bulge and he stumbles back, spinning around to glare at JD.

“Are you fucking out of your mind?” Kane hollers.

Jensen flinches, and Danneel rubs her hand over his neck in a comforting gesture.

JD stands firm, but Sterling pushes in closer just in case. The air in the room is suddenly alive with friction, and even Misha puts his feet down and leans forward in anticipation.

“Padalecki and Ackles? Are you fucking high?” Kane continues, vein bulging out of his forehead as JD continues to stare at him as still as a statue.

“Stop your hysterics. Cindy told me they needed help, and that’s that,” JD says. His expression turns shrewd. “We help people, Kane. Or did you forget that somewhere along the line?”

Alona snorts, and Kane nearly snarls at her.

JD, obviously seeing the situation heading towards a spiral, relaxes his body and holds up a placating hand. “Look, we’ve been driving all night. We’re tired. Let’s go rest up, and we can discuss this later over Danni’s latest casserole concoction and a whole lotta booze. Deal?”

“You love my casseroles,” Danneel responds, clucking her tongue, and the tension bleeds out of the room.

“If I believed in things like romance and happiness, I’d marry you for those casseroles,” JD responds, and the grin Danneel attempts—and fails—to hide is enough to get a tiny corresponding one out of Jensen.

“I’m gonna throw up,” Alona deadpans, which gets a laugh out of Sterling and Misha, and half-a-smirk out of Kane.

“I can’t believe I put up with any of you,” Danneel announces, pulling the boys to their feet and shooing them towards the doorway and back down the hallway.

“Get some rest, boys!” JD calls after them, his voice getting father away as they walk.

Another winding path leads them to a small room with a couple chairs, one decent sized cot, and a dresser with a mirror. Danneel waves them towards the middle of the room.

“We don’t have a lot of extra room around here, so I hope you don’t mind sharing a bed.”

Jensen looks over at Jared, whose cheeks are warming up into a blush.

“Yeah, I thought so,” Danneel replies with a smirk, reaching up to pat them both on the cheek before leaving the room. She closes the door behind her, and suddenly there is complete silence.

Jared blows out a long breath and flops down on the bed. He pats the space next to him, and Jensen gladly goes to take it. Jared wraps his arm around Jensen’s shoulders, holding him tight to his body. Jensen listens to Jared’s breath and his heartbeat. They are as comforting and as familiar and as necessary as his own.

“At least we’re together,” Jared says after a long moment. The truth of it is so deep that Jensen can’t think of anything else to do but nod.

Tilting Jared back on the bed, Jensen crawls next to him and holds him tight. He listens to the steady, reassuring beating of Jared's heart and lets exhaustion take him.

Later, Jensen wakes up and watches a still-slumbering Jared, the rhythmic cadence of his breathing soothing. He knows that soon they will have to face the others, but right now all Jensen wants to do is snuggle back into Jared's warmth and let himself feel safe.

So he does.

divider one

It’s weird wearing other clothing.

Jensen tugs at the sleeves of the flannel shirt Danneel gave him to put on instead of the cotton duplicate uniform. He’s not used to the fabric, and he almost feels a phantom itch on his skin where it’s touching the tiny hairs on his forearm.

“Thank you,” Jensen says softly as Danneel puts a bowl of what looks like pasta and vegetables down in front of him. It’s later that night, and they are in a different, yet still large room, this one with a long metal table and what looks like a kitchen attached to it. Jared sits next to him, like always.

“Where’s mine?” JD asks, scruff around his mouth turning down as he frowns.

“I’m not your maid. Get it yourself,” Danneel retorts, shooting him a perfectly pissy expression and sitting down next to Jensen to start eating her own dinner.

Titters go around the room as JD rolls his eyes and heads off towards the kitchen to feed himself. It’s still early yet, but Jensen’s trying his best to get a sense of the dynamic between the group. One minute, it’s fraught with tension, and the next it’s relaxed and more casual than Jensen is used to. It’s almost amazing how free everyone seems.

“This is really good,” Jared says, mouth full of pasta and look of ecstasy on his face. Jensen smiles fondly at him; there’s nothing his boy loves more than food. Except for maybe Jensen himself.

Jensen tries hard not to blush just thinking about it, but it must not work because Danneel nudges him and winks.

JD comes back, dropping a bowl down in front of Sterling, who salutes him and raises the bottle he’s drinking from. JD taps his own bottle against it, and they drink.

It goes like that for a while, the companionship easy in the silence as they finish their meal. It’s only when they are finishing—when the second bottles turn into three and then four—that things get looser yet more charged.

“What is this place?” Jared finally asks. He’s the brave one, Jensen thinks. If anyone is going to be the one to get information out of these hardened adults, it’s him.

JD looks around the room, almost like he’s checking to see how the others feel about giving out information. Sterling nods his head, and Kane and Alona shrug.

“It’s a former military base. One of a string of underground bunkers that were commandeered by the first rebel off-shoots after the last of the Great Wars.” JD pauses, and looks back and forth between the two boys. “How much do you kids know about your history?”

Jensen’s about to launch into what he remembers from the history holograms growing up, but Jared interrupts him.

“Nothing,” Jared says, and his voice is as bitter as Jensen as ever heard it. “Everything they told us was a lie.”

JD nods at that and gives a quick, humorless bark of a laugh. “Yeah, you’re probably right.”

Misha continues for him. “It started with a eugenics program. Geneticists attempting to create the ‘perfect child’. But for some reason they decided that instead of altering the child, they would start with the parent.”

“They created a ‘good virus,’ one that was supposed to purify people of genetic abnormalities,” JD keeps going. “They put it in the water supply.”

“There was a…” Misha pauses. “…bad reaction. The ones who didn’t die became infertile, and with the way the world was setup, it quickly spread and became a global problem. For a moment in time, the human race stopped being able to replicate itself.”

There’s silence in the room for a long moment. Jensen’s hand is shaking when he slips it into Jared’s.

JD clears his throat and keeps going. “When people found out what the leaders here had done, there was a coup led by members of the military who had been waiting for the opportunity. There was a series of civil wars after that, and after the dust settled the population was decimated and this part of the world became isolated from the rest."

Sterling pounds his bottle back on the table, face tight. “And to solve that problem, they brought in the docs again to create their little science projects.”

“We’re not science projects, we’re people!” Alona interjects, face red and mouth set in a grim line.

Jensen looks at her, startled. “You’re a duplicate?”

Alona gives a tight nod and leans back in her chair, pointedly not looking at anyone in the room.

JD gives it a moment and then brings the attention back to himself. “They didn’t publicize it because it probably would have led to mass abductions, but there were still some women left who could carry a pregnancy to term. The newly formed State created the duplicate system and used these women as incubators to start the program and replenish both the population and the work force. Eventually, it became self-sustaining, especially when they figured out a way to trigger a reproductive heat cycle in both dupe genders. The problem is that they weren’t able to ensure this ability in every model.”

“Nature’s complex randomness wins,” Misha adds, draining the last of his drink and pushing the bottle away from him.

“But now they are running scared, and that’s where we come in.” Kane finally speaks up and Jensen wonders why he’s been silent this long.

“But what about Commander Richings?” Jensen asks, thinking of that wizened face staring back at him his entire life.

JD snorts rudely. “Richings has been dead almost twenty years.”

Jared lets out a shocked gasp, staring at Jensen with wide eyes. Jensen shrugs helplessly. It almost feels like he’s lost a father, as sick as that thought is after everything they’ve just heard.

“They still use his face and speeches as propaganda across the entire hologram network. But he died in a bomb blast. His number two, General Heyerdahl, took over in the immediate aftermath. But the uniforms were split, and there’s been in-fighting ever since. Which is good for us, for obvious reasons.”

Kane picks up where JD leaves off. “Info has gone cold for a while now, but the last we heard there was a General Fuller who was fighting his way to the upper levels. Rumor has it that he’s just a puppet for a civilian company run by the two richest men in the State.”

Kane pauses and stares directly at Jared and Jensen.

“Those men are named Tristan Padalecki and Ross Ackles.”

Jensen’s thankful that he’s sitting, because there’s the possibility that he might pass out any moment.

“Here honey, drink this,” Danneel says soothingly, holding her bottle up to his lips and starting to tip it, before Misha interjects with a loud “Stop!”

Misha grits his teeth and looks quickly at JD and then back to Jensen. “He can’t have alcohol. He’s pregnant.”

It’s like an explosion goes off as half the table jumps to their feet, and bottles go smashing to the ground.

“JD, are you fucking insane? Stealing Ross Ackles’s pregnant dupe like it’s just another raid?” Kane asks, his face switching between rage and disbelief. “You’ll bring the entire State down on us.”

“Can’t take the heat, Kane? Still just a poor little rich kid rebelling against Daddy by playing with the big bad freedom fighters,” Misha mocks from where he’s still sitting nonchalantly at the table.

“Well at least I wasn’t helping create slave babies for those sick fucks,” Kane growls back at him, and Misha’s cool exterior is washed immediately with shame. His eyes flick to Alona, who is in the corner of the room pacing with a completely unreadable expression on her face.

Jensen finds himself instinctively holding his stomach and backing away from the group. Jared senses his movement and starts following him, as does Danneel, who is suddenly a ball of pissed off den mother.

“That’s enough, all of you! Don’t you think these boys have been through enough without having to listen to your shit? Humanity is not worth saving if people can’t even bother acting like rational adults.”

“Danni’s right, that’s enough,” JD agrees, standing to his full height and using every extra inch he has above Kane.

“Fine. Not like anyone is asking my opinion anyway,” Kane replies, voice tight, as he turns on his heels and stalks out of the room.

JD rubs a hand over his face wearily, and Jensen notices for the first time the worried lines around his eyes and mouth. “I’m sorry you had to see all of that. Kane’s a good guy, we all are. We’re just in a precarious situation, and we have to figure out what to do about it.”

“But we’re not figuring out anything tonight,” Danneel says firmly, giving JD a look that Jensen figures brooks no argument.

“Not tonight,” JD agrees. “Sterling and I are going to go get drunk on bootleg whiskey. I would suggest you do the same, but considering you’re teenagers, that would be a bad influence of me.”

JD’s smile turns soft, and Jensen can’t resist giving him a one in return.

“Let’s just go to bed, Jensen. I want to hold you,” Jared says quietly, just for him. He wraps his arms around Jensen and leans into his space.

Jensen lets out a shaky breath. Tomorrow’s another day, right?

“Yeah, let’s do that.”

==

The calm lasts for a few days. JD, Sterling, Kane, and Alona are gone during most of the day, leaving the boys with Misha and Danneel, neither of whom are telling them much. Jensen and Jared try to acclimate themselves to the new, tentative reality—resting and eating and spending as much time together as possible.

There’s a part of Jensen that knows he should be thinking about the life growing inside of him, but it’s still such an overwhelming and terrifying prospect that he tries to push it to the back of his mind. Jared’s hand will absently head towards Jensen’s stomach every now and again, but Jensen can see the moment Jared hesitates and pulls back. Jensen doesn’t say anything, because not saying anything somehow keeps it from being real.

On the third day of their new life, the entire crew sits down around the lighted table in what JD calls “The War Room.” Now less exhausted than when they first arrived, Jensen takes in his surroundings and notices an elaborate hologram setup and what looks like virtual maps set directly into the table. He’s intrigued but still a little tentative in inquiring exactly what it all means.

“So what now? Are we going to stay here forever?” Jared goes ahead and asks, drumming his fingers nervously on the table. JD’s standing at the head of the table, wiping a hand over his face a few times, before he sits down.

“No, this is only a temporary safehouse.” JD pauses, spreading his hands out on the table. “We’ve been putting some feelers out to contacts in the State. We know that Padalecki and Ackles know about your abduction, as they are calling it.”

“Are they coming for us?” Jensen asks, his voice wavering, but trying to stay strong enough to deal with what they need to.

JD shakes his head. “Not yet, but that’s not going to last long. They also know about the baby, which seems to have been the plan of your creation all along.”

“Sterling and I have been talking,” Kane butts in.

“That’s never a good thing,” Alona retorts before Kane cuts her off with a look and continues.

“We have to be smart about this. These two and the kid are leverage, the best we’ve had in years. We could try and trade them in for an entire facility of dupes—"

“These are people, not cattle for fuck’s sake,” Misha interrupts. Sterling holds up a hand to shut him up.

“It’s a good plan, JD. And you know it,” Sterling adds, looking at JD with a stoic expression.

There’s a tense silence in the room and no one breathes until finally Danneel breaks it.

“You can’t be seriously considering this, Jeffrey Dean,” she says incredulously, standing up and placing a protective hand on Jensen’s shoulder.

JD looks grim. “No, I’m not considering it. We’re not going to start trading people like they are objects.”

“Thank you,” Misha interjects, exasperated.

JD’s not smiling though, and Jensen gets the ominous sense that there is something he’s considering that they won’t like.

“But that’s not all, is it?” Jensen says, his voice soft but firm.

JD looks over at him, and slowly nods. “No, that’s not all. Their main priority is that baby you’re carrying. I think it’s best for everyone involved if we terminate. Misha was a dupe doctor, he can do it. It’s the best chance you two have of getting away from these people and having a new life.”

Jensen’s too shocked to say anything. He doesn’t have to, because seconds later Alona explodes, standing up from the table and rushing at JD.

“That’s not your damn decision to make,” Alona insists, pushing at JD even though he’s got half a foot on her.

“It’s a hell of a lot more my decision than yours, Tal,” JD growls, holding her back by the forearms. She flinches at the name, and Jensen realizes that must be that of her Original.

“Fuck you,” Alona hisses, struggling in his grasp.

“That’s ‘fuck you, boss’.”

She finally breaks the hold and punches him straight in the jaw, as the whole room finally awakens from its frozen state and starts rushing to separate them. Alona brushes Kane off when he tries to touch her, and starts walking backwards, holding her hand against her chest.

“I don’t have a boss, and neither do those boys. If you think we do, then you’re just as bad as the people you say you’re trying to stop,” Alona says soberly, spinning around and heading towards the door.

“Alona, wait!” JD calls after her, rubbing his jaw and waving off Misha’s attempts to come tend to him.

Jensen watches the entire scene play out like a messed-up hallucination, before finally standing up and heading towards the door himself. Maybe Alona is right, maybe these people they are trusting are just as bad as the doctors. Maybe they are worse, because they give false hope and care.

“Jensen,” JD says, noticeably softening his voice. “It’s okay, son. We’ll work it out.”

Jensen glances at him and then back at Jared, who is staring at him with a conflicted face that must match his own.

“I need to be alone. Please,” he mumbles, and runs out of the room as fast he can.

divider one

Jensen’s breathing heavy by the time he gets back to the little room he shares with Jared, both because of the physical exertion of running all the way and from the emotional toll that all of this information is giving him.

He slumps down on the cot, back against the wall, and tries to calm himself. His breathing slows, and wetness starts prickling the corner of his eyes, but he tries fiercely to hold it back.

His fingers itch, and he wishes desperately that he had a pad of paper and some pencils so that he could draw all the feelings that are rushing up inside of him.

Jensen feels the confusion and a weird mix of hope and uncertainty. Those things are normal, considering that they are on a path that they don’t know the ending to. Then there is the rage, the tiny spark of fire that even more people are taking it upon themselves to decide his future. This is also a feeling that seems normal, if not overwhelming.

But the thing that Jensen can’t get over is the feeling of disappointment over the revelation of his Original.

His Original. A powerful, terrifying, faceless man…no, not faceless. His face is Jensen’s face.

Jensen gasps with the knowledge, and wonders what else from this man is embedded in the strains of his DNA. His ruthlessness? His ability to create life for his own nefarious purposes? Is all of that inside of Jensen just waiting to rear its ugly head when he least expects it?

In a sense he’s lost two fathers in the last few days—the wizened face that he saw as his leader, and the face he sees in the mirror that is suddenly corrupt.

And then what of the child growing inside of him? How could Jensen know if he was capable of taking care of someone? Of giving it what it needs and, not only that, but what it should expect? He is sixteen. He would be a child raising a child in a cold, dark world that once seemed simple in its conformity, but now is prickly with complexity.

Maybe JD is right—maybe it’s better for everyone involved if Jensen just lets go.

A knock on the door breaks him out of his reverie, and he looks up expecting it to be Jared coming to see how he is doing. Instead, it’s Danneel, a small smile twisting her lips as she pushes open the door and slowly enters the room.

“Hi,” Jensen says, his voice soft. He wipes at his face, content to find no betraying streaks of moisture on his cheeks.

“Hi,” she replies, nodding towards the bed as if asking for permission to sit down next to him. He hesitates only for a moment before agreeing. Danneel, out of all of them, has been the kindest to them so far, and he is taking a chance that it’s sincere.

They sit in silence for a moment, Danneel rubbing her hands along her thighs. Jensen sits tucked up close to the wall, his knees to his chest protectively, arms tugging around them.

Finally, Danneel seems to sense that he is not going to speak first, so she starts.

“Cindy and I grew up together. Our fathers were high level military in Richings’s administration, and we lived on a base with the other families of the big shots. Like so many people, our mothers were unable to carry a baby to term, so they used duplicates to carry us.”

Jensen’s fingers tighten their grip on his legs, but he stays quiet and lets her continue.

“There are two types of breeding facilities. Ones to breed new dupe lines, usually ten at a time of each model to test the strength of the line, and ones to carry children of people who can afford to have their own. That was the type of place that I was conceived in. “ Danneel pauses, swallowing hard, and Jensen can see her struggle with the memory. “We didn’t know this at the time of course. All we’re taught is that there is a hierarchy to the world, and the dupes had their place in helping it survive, for the good of the rest of us. It wasn’t until later, when Cindy and I were in nursing school, that we learned more details about what really was happening.”

“You were a nurse, too?” Jensen asks, voice barely a whisper.

Danneel shakes her head and gives a tiny smile. “Almost, but not quite. In our third year of school, we met JD and Sterling. They were former military, but had deserted to join the rebel factions that had splintered off from Richings’s group. At first it was just about the excitement. Here were these dangerous guys who were preaching something completely opposite the way we were raised. They were talking about liberation and uprising and justice and it was such a foreign concept, but almost sexy at the same time, you know?”

“Did you go with them right away?” Jensen asks, the tension slowly easing from his body. He stays against the wall, but he lets his legs drop from his chest.

“Not right away. Cindy was a total Daddy’s girl and couldn’t believe that her father could possibly be partaking in something that sounded like modern day slavery. She believed what we were told, that the duplicates had their purpose and that purpose was above anything else. I had never thought much about it, frankly, but after being around JD and Sterling for a while, I went to my father and asked about the dupe who carried me. What was she doing now? Did anyone take care of her? Was she loved? Was she even a she?”

“What did he say?”

Danneel blinks a few times, and Jensen wonders at the shine in her eyes. “He laughed and shook his head. Told me to stop worrying about ‘silly things that don’t matter’ and patted me on the head like I was a child asking for candy before bedtime. A week later, I left school with JD and Sterling and never looked back. I haven’t seen my parents in over ten years.”

“I’m sorry,” Jensen says, and he means it. He knows how it feels it lose someone he cares about, for reasons that are beyond his control.

“Don’t be,” she replies, placing her hand on his knee and squeezing quickly before removing it. “The reason I’m telling you this is because you need to know how messy it can be when you have choices to make. I chose to leave everything I knew to fight for a cause I didn’t quite understand. Cindy chose to stay and attempt to help from the inside, showing kindness where she could. We make mistakes, Jensen, we’re fallible. Sometimes the choices that we make are the wrong ones, but freedom’s in the choosing.”

“I don’t know what to do,” Jensen whispers, chest constricting with an ache that he can’t quite name.

She places her hand gently on his face, wiping away the tears that have struggled so mightily to escape. “And that’s okay, too. Because you will, and when that time comes, you’ll see the beauty in the choice itself. That’ll help you once you’ve made it and have to live with it.”

Jensen’s hand comes up to cover hers and they sit still in the silence for a long moment. He takes the comfort that he sought as a child from Mother Tapping—comfort that he knows now was never genuine. This though, this moment feels right, and he will be forever thankful to Danneel for that.

“Jared’s almost bit my face off when I told him to stay until I got back. Is it alright to send him in here, if only to save my good looks?” Danneel says finally, grinning when it gets a small laugh out of Jensen.

He nods, taking in a deep breath as she kisses his cheek and leaves him alone once more.

==

That night, Jared and Jensen hold each other. Skin to skin—the natural heat of Jared’s body bleeding into Jensen until he is warmed from within.

Jensen kisses him first, a gentle press of lips that turns deeper when Jared opens his mouth and submits fully to his advances. Their tongues touch, stroke, a slick dance as their teeth clack, and Jared’s hands come up to cradle Jensen’s face with reverence.

They twist in the little cot, Jensen resting back, legs opening easily, and Jared slotting between. Puzzle pieces coming together, simple and by design.

Jared’s hands are warm and smooth, fingers long as they rub down Jensen’s body, along his thighs, and down to his opening. They are slick with something other than spit, and Jensen looks at Jared questioningly until Jared motions towards a small bottle of oil on the nightstand and whispers, “Misha. It was embarrassing,” with a shrug.

Jensen laughs softly, and then moans as Jared’s fingers find their way home.

“Jensen, my Jensen,” Jared mumbles against his mouth, the words the most beautiful Jensen knows because they mean so much.

It’s slow this night. Intimate. They move together—limbs twisting, pelvises meeting, words panted quietly into mouths. Jared brushes a hand over Jensen’s belly on the way to the hardened shaft of Jensen’s erection, and Jensen climaxes just like that. Jared follows quickly behind as Jensen’s muscles tense and twist.

Afterwards, Jensen lies half on top of Jared, their bodies sticky with sweat and seed but relaxed and lethargic.

Jared raises Jensen’s hand to his and kisses his knuckles, one by one, as he did on another night that now seems so long ago.

“No matter what you decide to do, I’ll support you,” Jared says, kisses them again, and then once more.

Jensen tilts his head up, nose grazing over Jared’s jaw as he breathes in the damp scent of him.

“This is your life, too, Jared.”

Jensen can feel him smiling as he speaks. “And isn’t it wonderful that we get the chance to say something like that?”

Jensen doesn’t have a response to that so he cradles himself deep in Jared’s arms and lets himself stop thinking.

divider one

Jensen soon realizes that there is only one other person that truly understands what he and Jared are going through as duplicates starting new lives—and that’s Alona. She’s prickly and quiet most of the time, standoffish in a way that Jensen suspects is a defense mechanism. The others obviously respect her skills both in fighting and with the hologram machine, but Jensen gets a sense that she doesn’t quite fit in.

That is a feeling that Jensen knows all too well, and it’s with this in mind that he goes to her a few nights later to see if she will talk to him.

He finds her in the War Room, hunched over the maps lighting up the table, her pretty face full of concentration. He doesn’t want to disturb her, but this is the first time he has managed to see her alone. He knows that talking to her outside of the stare of the others is the only way to get her to talk freely with him.

“Am I bothering you?” he asks, standing in the doorway and waiting for her permission to enter.

She looks him up and down quickly, a frown on her mouth. “Would it matter if you were?”

“If I say yes, will that help?”

The frown turns into a hint of a smile, and Jensen takes that as a sign to enter. He does, walking over to the table and taking a seat opposite her.

They sit in silence for a moment, as she goes back to her maps. He can see her eyes flickering back to him, and eventually she gives up the pretense of work.

“How are you feeling? With the, you know,” she says, nodding towards his stomach without saying the words.

“Physically, I’m fine. No sickness.” He pauses, figuring truth is his only chance at this point. “But, honestly? I’m terrified. Sometimes I’ll forget that something is inside me, and then I’ll remember and it’s like my body doesn’t even belong to me.”

“It didn’t belong to you, not then anyway,” she says, still not looking at him.

“I was already scared to begin with about the changes that my body were going to go through, what was possible for my body to do. They didn’t teach us that, even when the fever came. They said ‘be good, little one’ and just expected me to understand all the feelings that were suddenly coursing through me.”

“Just wait until you start showing,” she says, finally raising her eyes, a haunted look embedded in them.

“You know what that’s like, don’t you?” he says. It’s a wild guess, but his instinct tells him it’s the right one.

“Three times.” She pauses before continuing, and he’s surprised her voice never wavers. “I carried children for them three times.”

“Did you know what was happening?”

“No.”

“Did you get to see them when they were born?”

“No.”

“Do you know where they ended up?”

“The answer is always going to be no, Jensen. Letting us know what was happening to us was never going to be an option.”

Jensen swallows hard, hand going to his stomach without him even thinking about it. “What happened after the third?”

Alona wipes a hand across her mouth, and closes her eyes briefly before answering. “I couldn’t carry any more, so they were going to ship me to one of the brothels where the prettier models went when they became ‘defective.’”

“And Misha?”

“Misha was my doctor. He rescued me.” Her eyes lost a bit of focus, like she was thinking of another time and place. “He was also the one that did that to me all three times. He overcompensates now because of his guilt but I'm not sure it helps. It’s easy to try and forgive, but you never really forget.”

The tension between them suddenly makes sense, and Jensen wishes he could reach out and offer her comfort. He doesn’t think she would accept it, however, so he keeps his hands pressed against his stomach.

She looks up at him after a moment, really seeing him for the first time in a while. “But it wasn’t like that with you, was it?”

Jensen can’t help the blush and the small smile that breaks out over his face when he remembers stolen kisses and warm nights in Jared’s arms.

“No, it wasn’t like that at all. Jared and I came together out of love.”

“Well then, you’re already different than the rest of us,” she replies. She smiles briefly and then looks back to the maps, the dismissal obvious but not mean.

He nods absently to himself and stands, heading back to the door from which he came.

“Do you ever wonder where they are? The children you carried?”

He doesn’t know why he asks it. Knows it’s both inappropriate and cruel.

“You would expect me to say yes, but the answer is no. They weren’t mine and had nothing to do with me besides using me as their incubator. That might be selfish, but it’s the only way I get through the day.”

Jensen ponders her answer for a moment, his back still turned so that he can’t see the expression on her face. He thinks of one word out of her response and suddenly realizes exactly what he’s going to do.

He touches his still-flat belly with the tips of his fingers.

Mine, he thinks.

==

It takes Jensen three days to get up the courage to sit down at a table full of hardened adults and tell them that he is going to be the one to decide his future, and that of his unborn child.

Jared sits next to him, holding his hand for support. They’ve talked long and hard the past few days, discussing their fears and their hopes, and what they would do if things happen to go wrong. The one thing they decided for certain is that they are going to go through everything together, and face the future as the family unit they never knew to dream of.

“Tell me what our Originals want the baby for,” Jensen asks JD, knowing that he’s been out the past few days doing recon work and trying to throw the State off their trail.

“That baby represents the genetic mixture of the two most powerful men in the State,” JD starts, pausing to let that sink in. “It’s consolidation of power. It’s the future.”

Jensen and Jared glance at each other quickly. They had figured something like that was the reason behind all of this, but hearing it out loud was still numbing. Just knowing that they were only in the world because of some sick war game, all of the loneliness of their childhood to force some kind of government coup.

“Could they try it again? Attempt another duplication?” Jensen asks.

JD shrugs. “I suppose they could, but they don’t have the years to do it with. The State is a ticking time bomb. All it needs is someone to pull the detonator.”

“I want to be that someone.” The room is silent at Jensen’s words, the air heavy.

“I take it you’re going to keep the baby,” JD says, and it’s more statement than question.

Jensen takes Jared’s hand and puts it on top of the table, so everyone can see their intertwined fingers.

“I’m not going to pretend that I’m not scared, because I am. I don’t know how I’m going to react down the line, or even if me and Jared will make good parents. But I know that this baby is ours. Jared and Jensen’s, not Padalecki and Ackles’s. We’re not going to let them take our family away from us.”

JD takes a long, deep breath, his face a mask of contemplation as he takes in the words. Finally, after a moment, he nods his head and scratches the scruff of his beard. “Well, alright. It sounds like you’ve thought about this so I respect your decision, and I’m going to help you in any way I can.”

“The island,” Danneel interjects, sending the boys a comforting smile.

“Right, the island,” JD echoes. “There’s an island off the coast that is a designated Free State. It’s run by an older duplicate couple named Jim and Loretta. They help people either settle down or move on to another destination. It’s not easy to get to because the State guard patrols the waterway in-between, but the rule goes that if you get one foot on land, they’ll take you in.”

JD pauses, and the confident grin from the night he rescued them comes shining forward. “I’ll get you there, boys. Don’t you worry about that.”

“What do you think?” Jared whispers to Jensen. Jensen just nods his head encouragingly.

“Sounds like it’s worth a chance,” Jensen replies, leaning forward for a quick kiss before turning back to JD. “Before we go though, we want to know if there is anything we can do to help you all.”

“Alona?” JD says, turning their attention to where she is sitting in the corner of the table. Jensen looks at her expectantly, and she smiles briefly.

“There is actually something you can do.”

“Tell me what it is. We owe you our lives,” Jensen agrees.

“I finally figured out a way to hack into the hologram mainframe. All the holograms in every duplicate facility, and in the general public are connected by one giant unit. Hack into that, and we can broadcast whatever we want, all at once, to every hologram in the system.”

Jensen feels a weird mix of dread and excitement in his stomach, as he thinks about growing up watching what he now knows is State propaganda told through the lines and hollows of Commander Richings’s long-dead face.

“What would you broadcast?” Jensen asks. Alona’s face lights up with the biggest smile since he first met her. She’s beautiful and Jensen hopes that helping her with this will enable many more of those grins in the future.

“The State drugs the dupes as they go into their heat cycle so that they don’t feel things like attraction or arousal. They keep it that way so that their insides work for breeding, but in a completely mechanical and detached way. If we can get the dupes to understand that they are just like anyone else, that they can love and lust and feel and procreate because they want to and not because they have to, then they are one step closer to undermining the system that they are propagating.”

“And you boys are a perfect example of that future,” JD throws in. “A real live duplicate family, in living color.”

“And the clones will inherit the Earth,” Sterling says dryly, sipping his whiskey.

Alona tips her chin up and smirks. “We’re the ones who saved it.”

“I’ll do it,” Jensen blurts out quickly, knowing in his gut that it’s the right decision. He doesn’t know what he’s going to say—or if it will do anything in the long run—but he knows that he has to at least try.

Alona looks at him, emotion suddenly warring on her face. “Thank you.”

Jensen just nods, breathing in the moment.

divider one

“You’re a lot more aesthetically pleasing than Richings, that’s for sure,” Danneel quips, putting some weird stuff in Jensen’s hair as he sits on the chair they’ve designated for him for the hologram broadcast.

“Not being dead helps,” Misha retorts from the back of the room, feet once again propped up on a flat surface.

“Don’t listen to him, you’re a handsome prince of a child,” Danneel says. Jensen starts giggling at the fact that she’s actually cooing at him.

“Stop! You’re making me nervous,” Jensen says, but he lets Danneel pinch his cheeks and give him a quick kiss on the forehead for good luck.

“You’ll be fine, just speak from the heart,” JD says, coming up to stand behind where Alona is setting up the equipment.

Jensen takes a deep, shaky breath, and then blows it out and focuses himself in on the light in front of him. He stops and thinks a moment about who is going to be listening to him in a moment; will Genevieve be among them? Will any of this matter?

“Whenever you’re ready,” Alona says, and Jensen looks straight ahead and smiles.

“Hello. My name is Jensen, and I’m a duplicate. It took me sixteen years of my life to finally know who and what I am—an individual, with needs and wants of my very own. For sixteen years, I was known only as Ackles-1, but that wasn’t who I was. To all of you listening right now, to the duplicates who don’t know their own strength or the general populace who don't truly know what is going on—let me tell you a story.”

Jensen smiles at Jared over Alona’s shoulder, and Jared winks.

“This is just the beginning.”

tsom-EPILOGUEheader

3 Years Later

“Genny! Come here so Papa can feed you.”

Jensen watches with fondness as his toddler bumbles over to him from her spot in the sandbox. There are traces of sand all over her long, light brown hair, and her bangs are sticking up all over the place just like Jared’s. She gives a dimpled smile and holds out her arms to him.

“Oof, you’re getting so big,” Jensen says with an exaggerated groan, picking her up in his arms and squeezing her until she giggles herself silly. He pops her on his lap and pulls the bag full of tiny pink apple pieces out of the pack on the bench next to him.

She’s barely two pieces into it—juice all over her fingertips—when Jared comes running up from behind them and leans over to hug them both at the same time.

“Tell Daddy he’s squishing me,” Jensen protests, leading his head back so Jared can drop a soft kiss on his mouth.

“You love it,” Jared grins, coming round to the front and snatching their daughter right out of Jensen’s arms. He dances a squealing Genevieve around, and Jensen just shakes his head and laughs.

Jared’s just back from work, where he teaches guitar and piano to the children of other duplicates that were rescued by the rebels and relocated to the island that has become a refuge for the liberated.

Jensen—while raising little Genevieve—has become increasingly involved in the abolition movement, partly through educating the other duplicates about their rights as human beings and not just blunt tools and broodmares created by the elite. The rebels have done a lot of work in the past few years, and the public sentiment has started to turn against the government. Entire pockets of the State have been liberated, and many of the duplicates freed have joined the cause.

It’s a long road and a hard process. But for once in his life, Jensen feels like he’s accomplishing something good. It’s only a matter of time.

Jared swings Genevieve around a few more times and then collapses them both on the bench with a loud huff. Jensen looks over and remembers the other amazing thing he accomplished.

In the end, keeping the baby was the best decision they ever made, but for a long time it was a struggle. At times, Jensen felt like his body was betraying him—a foreign entity cruelly mocking him with the changes happening against his will. Misha and Danneel stayed on the island with them until Genevieve was born. A familiar presence during a time of great change and upheaval.

They decided to stay and raise their family on the island. It became a way station of sorts for the newly freed, some staying for only a fortnight and some settling down to join the growing community they had created.

Genny is thriving and happy, much like her parents. Ultimately there is no greater gift than that.

The future is never certain, but now, at least, it’s theirs.

The End

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From:

dugindeep.livejournal.com

Fabulous bb! I love seeing it all together in one fluid story. It's such a fascinating concept - the cloning and mass pregnancies in such a troubled world. I think you handled it so well and built Jensen's POV in such a tight manner. His thoughts on everything around him in Park One really set the tone for this world and their lives.

Congratulations on finishing this monster and getting it posted! ♥

From:

FIC: The Sake of Momentum (Part 3 and Epilogue)

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